Sometimes We Have to Shed People from Our Lives

English: A Bully Free Zone sign - School in Be...

A Bully Free Zone sign – School in Berea, Ohio (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Yesterday I had to vent about a jerk who insulted me and my intelligence.  I do not like venting on this blog, I like to keep things positive as much as I possibly can, but he made me mad and I do not believe in keeping things bottled up.  I thought it would be a good lesson in bullying by showing how dumb bullies can look when they go off on people for no reason.

It should also be a good lesson in how we should not let crazy people and their crazy ideas about us hurt our progress in life or bring us down to their level.

When faced with a particularly nasty person, you can do one of two things.  You can:

A.) Let them rant and rave like a loony

People will see them acting like a nut and it will reflect poorly on them and gain more sympathy for you.

B.) Walk away from that person, leaving them to cuss and scream to themselves

The moment someone starts cussing and screaming at you, just walk away.  This is probably the preferable option of the two, and it is much easier to do if the person is fighting with you online.  Modern technology makes it easy for you to ignore horrible people.

Regardless of when and where the bully is, one thing is perfectly clear:  you do not have to put up with their bullying.  As Hottentots reader and commenter Jessica Crooks said yesterday, “Sometimes we have to shed people from our lives.”

Never let the bully have the upper hand in a situation.  Do yourself a favor and stop all association with them if it is possible…and most of the time it is possible.

If you are in school and someone is picking on you, please tell someone in authority—a parent, a counselor, a teacher, a member of the clergy.  Do not think that you have to deal with this on your own.   There are people who can and will help you before a situation gets out of hand.

If you are an adult in an abusive relationship, call the authorities and go to a safe place.  Do not allow anyone to yell at you or put their hands on you.  You are a human being and deserve to be treated like one.

It is time to wake up and realize that abuse, whether it is physical or mental—or both—is not normal and should be handled before it’s too late.  There are too many instances of school shootings occurring because the shooter was allegedly bullied and too many men and women winding up dead because they stay in abusive relationships.  This needs to stop.  Now.  There is no excuse for harassment and violence.

Take any steps necessary to get rid of all your toxic relationships and develop new ones that will enrich your life and make you whole again.  Remember, folks, you choose your own path in life and choose the people who will go down that path with you.  You cannot blame anyone other than yourself if you do not choose wisely.

I do not care if the negative person is your parent or some other family member or your next door neighbor, you do not have to put up with them.  Sever all ties with them and begin to heal.


Dear Liberals, Sometimes You Try Too Hard to Be Fair

Publicity photo of Bill Macy and Bea Arthur fr...

Publicity photo of Bill Macy and Bea Arthur from the television program Maude. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Have you ever watched the 1970s sitcom Maude?  It was a good show, a spinoff of All in the Family that brought up a lot of controversial topics—abortion, homosexuality, race relations, and many other things that made people cringe back in the day if you brought them up in polite company.

Maude Findlay was a proud liberal woman.  She fought hard for the little guy (or gal) in society.  She wanted justice for the poor and women and ethnic minorities.  And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.  It’s  a very good thing that someone, whether it’s a character on a television show or an activist in real life, would stand up and fight for the rights of people who are regularly discriminated against.

There was one slight problem with Maude’s crusade for equality, though—she was trying too hard.  Her undying need to show everyone how open-minded and liberal she was often blew up in her face.

One big example of this is how she was a successful, upper middle class woman who felt that she understood the struggles of poor blacks.  So she hired a black woman as her maid, a stereotypical role, and to show that she viewed the maid as her equal, she insisted that she come through the front door instead of the back.  (The maid didn’t want to come through the front door, she preferred the back entrance.)

I am a far left activist, and in my lifetime, I have seen a lot of liberals just like Maude.  They go out and fight for justice and chant a lot about equality, but it seems that a lot of the time they are just jumping on a bandwagon.  They’re not genuine.

English: A Bully Free Zone sign - School in Be...

English: A Bully Free Zone sign – School in Berea, Ohio (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Say, for instance, a liberal takes up the cause of cyber bullying.  That’s an important cause, right?  People should want to join the fight to end bullying, both online and in real life.  So to show that they are really against cyber bullying, the liberal picks a random bully and decides to give them a dose of their own medicine.

Is that justice, or is that completely defeating the purpose of fighting cyber bullying?

I once knew a person, a self-proclaimed liberal, who insisted on showing the world that they liked to fight for what is right in the world.   And traveling in the same circles as the liberal was a cyber bully who had a habit of digging into people’s personal lives offline and making sensitive information public.

The self-proclaimed liberal, like many other people, didn’t like what the bully was doing, so they decided to get revenge.  How did they do it?  They turned the tables on them, hacked into their account, and began sharing personal photographs and other information to people the bully harassed.

Some of you might not see a problem with doing that.  You think that the bully got their just desserts.  But two wrongs don’t ever make a right.  And innocent people are sometimes dragged into a situation they had nothing to do with.  In the case of the bully fighting liberal, they dragged the person’s spouse other into the situation.  There was no reason to do so other than to hurt the bully.  And it didn’t bother them too much because they continued to bully other people.  It might have even made them worse than before.

So in the end the self-proclaimed liberal chose a good battle, but fought it in all the wrong ways, just like Maude always did on television every week.

So what can be done to make sure your plans don’t backfire?  When you take up a cause, you might want to know why you are fighting for it, why it is important to you.  And you want to expose how harmful something is to society and give solutions to the problems.  You can’t eradicate a problem if you choose to use it against someone else.  You can’t prove a point like that.

What do you think?

If you like this topic, please feel free to comment below.  And don’t forget to subscribe via e-mail or RSS so you never miss a new post!  I look forward to hearing from you.

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