Sometimes We Have to Shed People from Our Lives


English: A Bully Free Zone sign - School in Be...

A Bully Free Zone sign – School in Berea, Ohio (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Yesterday I had to vent about a jerk who insulted me and my intelligence.  I do not like venting on this blog, I like to keep things positive as much as I possibly can, but he made me mad and I do not believe in keeping things bottled up.  I thought it would be a good lesson in bullying by showing how dumb bullies can look when they go off on people for no reason.

It should also be a good lesson in how we should not let crazy people and their crazy ideas about us hurt our progress in life or bring us down to their level.

When faced with a particularly nasty person, you can do one of two things.  You can:

A.) Let them rant and rave like a loony

People will see them acting like a nut and it will reflect poorly on them and gain more sympathy for you.

B.) Walk away from that person, leaving them to cuss and scream to themselves

The moment someone starts cussing and screaming at you, just walk away.  This is probably the preferable option of the two, and it is much easier to do if the person is fighting with you online.  Modern technology makes it easy for you to ignore horrible people.

Regardless of when and where the bully is, one thing is perfectly clear:  you do not have to put up with their bullying.  As Hottentots reader and commenter Jessica Crooks said yesterday, “Sometimes we have to shed people from our lives.”

Never let the bully have the upper hand in a situation.  Do yourself a favor and stop all association with them if it is possible…and most of the time it is possible.

If you are in school and someone is picking on you, please tell someone in authority—a parent, a counselor, a teacher, a member of the clergy.  Do not think that you have to deal with this on your own.   There are people who can and will help you before a situation gets out of hand.

If you are an adult in an abusive relationship, call the authorities and go to a safe place.  Do not allow anyone to yell at you or put their hands on you.  You are a human being and deserve to be treated like one.

It is time to wake up and realize that abuse, whether it is physical or mental—or both—is not normal and should be handled before it’s too late.  There are too many instances of school shootings occurring because the shooter was allegedly bullied and too many men and women winding up dead because they stay in abusive relationships.  This needs to stop.  Now.  There is no excuse for harassment and violence.

Take any steps necessary to get rid of all your toxic relationships and develop new ones that will enrich your life and make you whole again.  Remember, folks, you choose your own path in life and choose the people who will go down that path with you.  You cannot blame anyone other than yourself if you do not choose wisely.

I do not care if the negative person is your parent or some other family member or your next door neighbor, you do not have to put up with them.  Sever all ties with them and begin to heal.

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10 Comments

  1. Toxic people in your life are not good if you are trying to live a healthy life full of happiness. You can’t always avoid toxic people but you don’t have to put up with them. Thanks for the reminder.

    Reply
    • I know I certainly can’t avoid them, but my life has been so much better since I stopped putting up with their BS. :D

      Reply
      • You can avoid the ones that you can completely cut off from your life. Which makes life a whole lot easier :)

      • Absolutely. If one wants to live with as little stress as possible, one should start with getting rid of some of the relationships that cause a lot of stress.

      • Ahhhh yes the true way to happiness I wish I had learned this lesson sooner in life. I did not but now I ensure that I do not let the toxic people have a place in my life. Which in turn truly makes life so much better. Now if I could only talk to the people that have common sense my life would be perfect :)

      • Half the time I don’t use any common sense so I can’t expect to attract anyone who has it. lol It’d be nice, though! :D

  2. Oh, yes, we definitely have to shed people from our lives at times. Sorry you had to deal with this, but sounds like you’re taking good steps to detox from this sort of thing :)

    Reply
    • If this had happened to me 10 years ago, I’d still be crying into a tub of Ben and Jerry’s, wondering why people are so mean. Not joking. lol But since then I have learned how to deal with things in a more productive (and less fattening) way. ;)

      Reply
  3. Adam Weiner

     /  October 17, 2012

    Too true, Ang. Bullies gain power from our reactions – take those away and they have bubkes.

    Reply

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